The Act of Becoming

I just watched a movie about Jane Austen. As an avid reader, I really enjoyed learning more about one of the most famous female authors of the past two centuries. The movie did break my heart in the end, but it was good. It is only good movies that have that much power over me.

The most interesting part about seeing the movie was the ability to watch Jane in her becoming. She makes active choices in her life that lead to some things I am sure she would have rather avoided. Regardless of that though, she still became someone incredible.

I'm at the point of my life where I am beginning to become. I'm not quite sure what I am becoming at this point. A few years ago, I thought I knew who I would be at this point in my life, but I have no idea at this point.

The act of becoming is something that many of the people in my life are in the process of. Many of us are trying to figure out what it is exactly that we are going to become. We are not sure.

In the end, I'm not sure the act of becoming is something that we have total control over or if it is something that we must cede control of in order for it to happen. Control is something that I enjoy having and something I find difficult to let go of. Perhaps that's why I have vigilantly overseen what it is that I am becoming. I have made the choices that make me who I want to me.

Unfortunately the choices that I have had to make so far are not the ones that will define me. They are not hard and they do not require much thought. They may require feeling, but they do not require much thought. They have not changed large parts of my life. I am envious of those who have had the strength to make the choices I have shied away from. I know there will come a time in my life that I will be forced to make the same choices, but I have simply not had to make them yet.

I have not had to decide where to live, who to live my life with, or what career path I will choose. I have not made many sacrifices in my life although I am sure that I will later in my life. The choices that I have made will shape my life in different ways. I have chosen what school to attend, who to live with while I am here, what summer job I will hold and when I will fall in love. Well, perhaps the falling in love is less of a choice and more of a matter of situation.

The act of becoming is one of the most hazardous acts that we shall all go through at points in our life. There will be moments when we decide that we don't want to do it anymore and simply stay the way we are, but we don't get that option. Becoming is something we spend our lives doing, we don't really have much choice in this. From the day we are born, we make choices and shape our lives and become who we are supposed to be.